2012: Resolutions or Goals?

Do you set New Year’s resolutions? What do you resolve to do? How do you hold yourself to these resolutions?

If you break your resolutions, you’re not alone. According to Steve Shapiro’s statistics, three out of four people almost never keep their New Year’s resolutions.

I think I know why.

At the end of the year, we quickly resolve to finally lose that 20 pounds or stop smoking. It seems like the right time to do it. Unfortunately, the timing is the only factor we have in place. And that’s just not enough.

If you want to make 2012 your best year yet, here are a few ideas on setting your 2012 goals:

First, reflect on the year behind you.

Then think about what you truly want in 2012 and why you want it. How excited do you get when you think of it? What will your life be like when you’ve achieved it?

Maybe you don’t get excited about going to the gym three times a week, but you get excited imagining yourself healthy, thin, and full of energy. So going to the gym three times a week is a great resolution for you – if that’s the best way for you to become healthier, thinner, and more energetic. You may need to remember that deeper goal in order to get yourself to the gym.

Or maybe you feel guilty when you think about your wasted gym membership, but you’re excited about your business and you just don’t have time for the gym right now. Let go of the guilt and do what matters to you! You can create a goal for your business instead. Or think about what you would get out of going to the gym, and if that’s important to you, use that deeper motivation to get yourself to the gym.

The right goal for you will not be the right goal for someone else. Be sure your choices are based on what truly matters to YOU.

One more hint – use your imagination. Try spending a few minutes each day (Mike Dooley recommends no more than 10 minutes a day) imagining your life the way it will be when you’ve reached your goal. Of course, you must take action as well. But imagining it, as though you already have it, will help your goal feel possible and keep your motivation high.

Happy New Year!


Reflecting Before Resolving

In a day or two, I’ll be posting about business goals for the new year. But first let’s reflect upon the year that’s drawing to a close.

Too often we start our New Year’s resolutions with thoughts like “This is the year I’ll finally get to the gym three times a week” or “I wonder how many weeks this resolution will last?”

Reflecting on the months behind you can help you look forward with more optimism. Too often we minimize our accomplishments and magnify our shortcomings.

Here are some questions that might help you look at 2011 both thoughtfully and productively. You may want to get a notebook and paper, or you might just want to take some time to sit and think about these questions. My focus here is on business, but of course, it’s a wonderful time to reflect on all aspects of your life.

  • What did I accomplish in my business this year?
  • Of which accomplishments am I especially proud?
  • What did I want to do in 2011 that didn’t get done? Is this (or are these) still important to me? If so, why? And if so, how can I create a plan, with baby steps, to accomplish this?
  • What business activities did I do that didn’t serve me? How can I eliminate or reduce those activities in 2012?
  • Which business activities served me better than I had anticipated? How can I do more of them in 2012?
  • Who helped me in my business this year?

This is also a great time, of course, to reflect with appreciation on your clients and customers.

And, last but not least, be sure to reflect with appreciation on you! Your business would not be what it is if someone else were running it.

As you look back on 2011, it may be tempting to get upset with yourself over things you didn’t do, and real or imagined faults. But if you’ve still got a business to run in 2012 (I’m not talking about money here, I’m talking about the gifts you have to offer people), give yourself a pat on the back and know that you’re now shining even brighter than you did a year ago as you get ready to ring in the new year.




Web Hosting 50% Discount at HostGator: Black Friday Only

If you’re looking for a web host today (November 25, 2011), HostGator is offering a really good deal. Today only, they’re offering 50% off web hosting.

The 50% is taken off your first invoice only. But if you sign up for six months, a year, two years, or three, the savings should be substantial.

I switched to HostGator two years ago and I’ve been happy with them.

Again, this is a Black Friday special and is only available on Friday, November 25, 2011, starting and ending at midnight Central time.

To get the discount, visit HostGator today only.



Does Life Coaching Ruin Comedy?

So many comedies rely on the terrible choices their characters make for their humor. Yeah, that can be funny. When Jane (Meryl Streep) has an affair with her married ex-husband in “It’s Complicated,” I know it’s a bad choice. She knows it’s a bad choice. But it was a comprehensible bad choice. When hilarity ensues, you’re not still shaking your head at her stupidity. It was a bad choice, but it wasn’t a stupid choice.

Far too many comedies have characters that make choices so nonsensical you’re more likely to be dumbstruck (literally) than amused.

I enjoyed the movie “Horrible Bosses.” It was funny and had a great cast.

It’s about three friends, each having bosses so horrible that together they decide to murder them. Makes Jane’s bad choice look pretty tame in comparison, huh?

Anyone would notice how crazy the premise is. I watched it with my ex, who enjoyed the movie but noted “they’re immoral!” And yet we all know, fiction requires a suspension of disbelief. If you can handle a disturbing premise, you just roll with it and enjoy the ride.

Now that I’m a life coach, though, I was struck than usual by just how many alternatives these characters had.

Instead of enjoying the ride, I was thinking about how I’d coach these guys!

So did life coaching ruin this comedy for me? No, but it did get me thinking:

How would I coach Nick, Dale, and Kurt?

Tune in to the next blog entries to find out…

Don’t Miss My September Special!

Only eight days left for my back-to-school special! It’s a great deal, one that I probably won’t ever offer again.

I’m offering one month of coaching for $99. That’s three 60-minute sessions. The offer is risk-free, because you’re free to enjoy a complimentary session before you decide whether or not to invest in the coaching.

You just need to book your first session (whether it’s a complimentary session or the first of your three paid sessions) by September 30, 2011.

Please note – you don’t need to have the session by September 30, you just need to contact me and set it up by then.

To book your session, just contact me. You may want to do it now, before September slips away!



Back-to-School Coaching Special – Rare Offer

Our kids are back to school and we have more time. Much as I love having my son around, I can’t wait to do more coaching!

If you can’t wait to spend more time on yourself and your business, you’re in luck! I’m offering a special so good I probably won’t do it again.

But I only have a couple of openings, so this is a first-come, first-serve offer.

For a little while, I’m offering your first month of coaching for just $99. You’ll receive three 60-minute sessions.

If you love coaching (you probably will), you can continue at the regular rate of $297 per month. If not, no problem. You’ll certainly benefit from a month of coaching, but there’s no need to continue.

That said, you will benefit the most from a commitment of at least three months. That’s about how long it generally takes to make lasting changes in your life.

So if you decide to continue on, I will request a two-month commitment. If you continue beyond that, I book in three-month segments.

What if you’re intrigued by this offer but still not sure you want coaching?

I offer a complimentary session so you can find out more about whether coaching is right for you and whether or not we would be a good match. Although $99 is an exceptionally good rate for one month of coaching, I respect your right to experience coaching before parting with $99 of your hard-earned money. So feel free to request a complimentary session before committing to this month of coaching.

The Rules

  • This offer ends on September 30, 2011, or when I have booked all available openings, whichever comes first.
  • To take advantage of this offer, contact me to set up the first session. This session can be a complimentary session.
  • Payment is due before the first session (excluding the complimentary session, of course).
  • This offer is only valid for new clients.

A request

This is a great deal, and it’s intended for people who are serious about coaching. It’s not intended for people who want a month of coaching at a very low fee, but who have no intention of developing a longer-term coaching relationship.

So I do ask that you only take advantage of this offer if you have at least some interest in continuing the coaching relationship for longer than one month.

That said, I fully understand that you may not know whether or not you want more than a month until you’ve experienced coaching. As I said, there’s no obligation to continue.

I’m very excited to make this offer and I hope this will inspire you to give coaching a try and find out how much this exciting process can benefit you!





How I Manifested – then Unmanifested – Abundance

After my weekend with Mike Dooley, followed two days later by a powerful shamanic session with a coaching colleague, I was feeling fantastic and ready to manifest. And manifest I did! The day after the shamanic session, a friend told me about a high-paying opportunity as a home health aide one day a week, possibly leading to two days.

One day on this job would have paid over a third of my expenses, leaving me plenty of time to build my coaching business!

I called and it seemed that the job was mine. I made plans to visit the home later this week.

Meanwhile, a couple of other smaller opportunities came in. A woman took me up on a forgotten offer to review home pages for $79. A company requested a link to the home page of my website building website for $20 a month.

This manifesting stuff was really working!

So the other day, my ex-husband expressed some misgivings he had about the job. He insisted I’d have to lift the man I’d be working for, although that wasn’t listed as a job responsibility.

I went home, got onto the internet and looked up the job responsibilities of home health aides. I noticed that they require home health aide training, which I don’t have. I started worrying about that.

The next day, I called the woman offering the job to get some needed details. She was quite apologetic as she told me that the home health aide working there five days a week insisted that the new aide be trained as a home health aide.

It’s hard to say what would have been the best outcome. But in terms of manifesting abundance, what a lesson!

Mike Dooley insists that “thoughts become things” and now I’ve got my proof.

The funny thing is, I’m not worried. I just learned how to manifest – and how to unmanifest.

I think I’ll start manifesting bigger and better things.

Ain’t the Universe grand? 🙂



So *that’s* why I attracted that

I promised to offer my take on why we attract “bad” things or circumstances in my next to last post.

I gave three examples, but for the sake of brevity, I’ll just look at one. If you want me to offer my take on the others, let me know.

Let’s go with the tailgating car. Did you attract that to you? Well, if you’re driving well below the speed limit, yeah. Nothing too spiritual about that.

But what if you’re driving at a normal speed? It seems there are plenty of drivers these days who won’t be satisfied with that.

I was always afraid of tailgaters. I would panic when they were behind me. And it seemed they were always there. Big trucks on Route 128! Yikes! Very often my son was in his infant chair or his booster seat, in the back seat of the car. That’s when my fear was the worst.

And that’s probably when I got the most tailgaters.

I have to be honest, it could be that I was driving more slowly than other drivers and that’s why. Or it could have been that energy of fear (which I will probably feel again when I have grandchildren in their booster seats in the back of my car).

Either way, I can take some responsibility for attracting so many tailgaters.

As I pointed out in my other post, that doesn’t mean I’m to blame. When those grandchildren-to-be are in my car, and I’m feeling that fear, I will feel no guilt. Or maybe I’ll overcome the fear, I don’t know.

But the good news is, when I take responsibility for what I’m attracting I can no longer consider myself a victim.

Now, I get fewer tailgaters, and when I do, I very gradually slow down to a speed at which I feel more in control and less vulnerable. (It’s difficult to switch lanes when a tailgater is blocking your view of the traffic in the other lanes.) That usually gets the tailgaters out of my way, as they finally switch to the fast lane.

Every so-called problem you have is an opportunity to notice how you react, inwardly and outwardly. So when a car is tailgating you, or a cashier is rude to you, try noticing how you feel, physically and emotionally. Notice how you react outwardly. See what you can learn about yourself.

If you have any experiences in which a “problem” has turned into a growth opportunity, please leave a comment and share!



Mike Dooley + Kripalu = TOTALLY AWESOME!

It’s Tuesday and I’m still high off the excitement of a weekend at the Kripalu Center in Lenox, MA, to see Mike Dooley.

I’ve been a huge fan of Mr. Dooley for years now, ever since I started getting his uplifting, whimsical Notes from the Universe.

The topic was “Playing the Matrix,” which is also what he teaches in his book Manifesting Change.

It’s basically Mike’s take on the Law of Attraction. He’s come up with his own set of rules and they rock!

We learned that it is okay to attach to what we desire, as long as it’s general. For instance, if what you want is a relationship, wealth, a fulfilling career, go ahead and attach. Just don’t attach to the details.

So do we avoid the details? Nope. We use those to get playful and visualize every little bit of what life will be like when we have what we want. And yet, the Universe may not give us exactly that car or exactly that job. That’s okay, because whatever it gives us will be perfect.

If “Playing the Matrix” is playing in your neck of the woods, I highly recommend you go! You can find out where Mike is appearing here:

World Tour III: Playing the Matrix

Looks like you’ll have the most luck if you’re outside the US at this point.

You can also learn to play the matrix from Mike’s book Manifesting Change. (link)

By the way, if you get the Notes, you won’t be surprised to hear that Mike is kind, warm, funny, playful, and just plain delightful.

Here’s a photo of us together from this weekend:

Mike Dooley and me



P.S. I didn’t forget about Part 2 of my last post. I just couldn’t wait to tell you about my visit to Kripalu. I’m still excited about it!

Now Why Would I Attract That?

I’ve been learning more and more how true it is what they say: we attract our circumstances to us.

It’s a truth that I used to resist. I think most of us do.

How am I to blame, after all, when the tailgater behind my car rear-ends me, when that cashier was rude to me, or when my boyfriend tries to tell me how to raise my son?

Simple. I’m not to blame. This isn’t about blame. There’s a big difference between attracting circumstances to yourself and holding yourself at fault. Most of us attract these circumstances unconsciously. In fact, it can be a huge challenge to even recognize how we’re doing this, let alone learn how control it.

Okay, fine, semantics. So how did I attract the circumstance of being rear-ended by the tailgater, or having the cashier be rude to me, or having the boyfriend tell me how to raise my son?

I’ll tell you in my next blog post. Here’s a hint, one I learned from iPEC, my coach training school: There are no problems, only opportunities.

Stay tuned….